This is an age old problem in a damn NEW damn era... consistently!!! My GIRL has been dating this guy who treats her like PLATINUM. I mean, not just the reg ish.. like taking her out, calling when he says he's gonna call.. but actually likes spending time with her -- ALL THE TIME... concerned about her well being and shows it.. sends flowers just because... he REALLY likes her. He has a great job.. loot (took u bac eh??).. ambitious, educated, nice looking, folks luv him. The prob -- she's not feelin him.. HE'S A NICE GUY. WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
Sorry so late.. but I've been CRAZY busy all morning.
My homegirl is still seeing dude... I mean, it's tough. She goes on great dates, he's supportive and he treats her nice. Though she knows there's nothing there, the "great on paper" saga continues....
12 comments:
Tell your girl to learn how to feel the nice guy. It takes a little time but she'll appreciate him in the long run. Take it from someone that was always attracted to the "Bad Boys". The nice guy brings less drama. So, tell her to be patience.
I know exactly how your girlfriend is feeling...I've broken up with my man 2 times in the last year b/c sometimes I just don't see him like "that". But I always get back with him b/c he is such a wonderful person. I guess I'm not the best person to be shelling out advice... If it's not one thing it's another but the key is chemestry. If she doesn't feel any chemestry with him then she needs to keep on looking. There are a lot of wonderful men out there and I'm a firm believer that every person that comes into your life is God's way of preparing you for the next. There is no point in settling and if she's not happy she is settling.
Never force the issue.
You can't hide the truth.
This is coming straight out of the book "why men love bitches". Bitch, of course not meant in a bad way but more like the girl that is not phased by anything and thus the guy keeps coming on stronger. Well the way I see it if she is not feeling him she should keep it moving. Like the other person said you can't force it. And plus sticking around can ruin this dude for the next gal. Because if they do break-up he is not going take time to heal but jump right back out there. And nothing is worse then a wounded man..hahaha! Trust me I am trying to shake one loose down here in MD...
Been there done that........I did try to like him but it was just something that wasn't clicking so I let him go. I say try and see if the feelings come if not let him go.
I'm gonna have to agree with Dar cause she's setting up dude 2 treat the next girl like crap bc he is treatin her so nice and as much as she tries not 2 im sure she is throwing him shade and he doesn't deserve it. I would say try and stick it out but is so hard to fake chemistry but be careful because u will get exactly what u r asking 4!!!
WOW THATS A HARD ONE! Well, it's not right to lead someone on especially if he/she has real feelings for you, but then on the other hand, finding a man like that is very rare. I would tell him because it's pointless fooling him and yourself into thinking that you guys can be together when you know otherwise. That might eventually BACKFIRE hurting you and him even more.
Judging by how sweet he is I think he deserves to know the truth about how you really feel about him.
OR
Evil Suggestion:
You can keep him around for as long as you could while having your true lover boy on the side fulfilling the other needs he can't seem to fulfill.
hahahahaha
NICE GUYS............It is what it is! LOL:-D! She is not attracted to him. She need to leave him alone for someone else to pick up. And stop wasting his and her time. Poor guy.....She'll ditch this guy and find her BAD Boy and he is going to treat her like Crap.....then she'll catch THE VAPORS, She is going to wish she never left THE NICE GUY. On the other hand, you need a challenge. Tell him to MAn Up or he is going to lose his girl. She should think about what she is doing.
I can't help but say a few more things after having read everyone's comments from the day.... Marlene makes a great point. How long has this girlfriend been seeing this guy? She may need to relax and give it some time. No need to rush and make any big decisions. Also, communication is the key. Like one of the anonymous comments said, maybe she should tell him to cool off a bit and give her a little breathing room. Breathing room (and I can say from experience, a little break of some kind) can result in a new found respect and appreciation for such a nice guy.
Well my 1st question is: how old is this "homegirl"? If she's young, move on. That's a no brainer. If she's older - grow up. Are you kidding me, youre still looking for a bad boy?
At the end of the day people like who they like. She can not change the fact that she is attracted to dangerous dudes, if she could I am sure that she would have done so by this point.
In life there are compromises, she may need to find her a CORPORATE THUG : ) Somebody from the hood still a little ghetto, but he know how to throw on a suit and tie and do his thang. Treats a woman like he would treat his MOMMA, but when her azz get to big for her britches he checks her : )
She needs to let this dude move on it will be difficult for both of them at first but there is no Love Connection there.. & we will be back in 2 & 2!!!
Im there right now My guy is so sweet buthe is boring...great on paper...unfortunateley there is just no chemisty... Ive been struggling with this since September...I finally just let it go 3 weeks ago..We r still cool and yes I miss him but I need that fire...
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